Level Setting Exam

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Most experts come to an agreement that it takes between 90 seconds and four minutes to decide what we think about someone and although we would like to think this is due to our sparkling conversation which might interest the person we are talking to, 80 percent of this impression actually comes from our body language. And this is before we’ve even opened our mouths! Of course, what you say will obviously matter later on in the relationship, but it means you need to get the body language right straight away or people won’t stay around long enough to find out how fascinating you really are!

Many gestures, such as how you say “yes” or “no” are country-specific, but others are universal. For example, all people wrinkle their noses and raise their top lip to show they find something horrible, even though the things which actually disgust us are often very different. Everyone knows what a smile is, too, and when you are only pretending to smile. This is because muscles around the eyes are linked to the emotional part of your brain, which are very hard to control, and they only work when you really mean it. Also, a real smile will fade after a few seconds, whereas fake smiles will last much longer.

There are also signals to tell us whether someone fancies us. When people flirt with you, they are absolutely programmed to make eye contact. Their pupils will enlarge and they will blink more and more often. Admirers will also mirror your behavior, often unconsciously. So if you lean forward or take a sip of the drink, you will find that they will do the same. However, there is another gesture we are probably unaware of, but which is used by every culture on Earth and which some experts claim is the most instantly recognizable non-verbal human greeting. When we first see someone we find attractive, our eyebrows rise and fall and if they feel the same, they raise their eyebrows, too. It is not surprising if you have ever noticed, since the whole process only lasts about a fifth of a second!

The last warning; don’t judge people on one thing alone! Look for four signals before you believe it. Sitting with arms crossed might mean someone is being defensive, but then again, it might not just mean they are feeling cold.